Sunday, May 15, 2005
Mixed Emotions
We just returned from my grandmother's 85th birthday party. It was mostly fun, and she enjoyed seeing her three daughters, two of three grandchildren and three of four great grandchildren (the others are on vacation).
I am lucky to have known all of my grandparents well, since the first one died when I was 28. In fact, I have memories of five great grandparents and was in graduate school when the last one of them died.
Seeing this remaining grandparent always produces mixed emotions. We are connected by blood and many shared moments, but those connections are negated by her consistently childish behavior.
She and my grandfather were married for more than 55 years until his death, and she criticized him constatnly during the time I was around. It pissed me off then, and it still bothers me that she took so much joy from his life with her comments.
He was Methodist preacher when that job not only included ministerial duties, but also groundskeeping and handyman work at the church and parsonage. He had no associate ministers, and he even printed the bulletins for the services on a manual printing press. He did all this with a quiet dignity that I still find inspiring. He was as close to a saint as I have ever known.
I know the day is quickly approaching when I will have no grandparents remaining, and I regret that my feelings about my remaining grandparent are so mixed.
I am lucky to have known all of my grandparents well, since the first one died when I was 28. In fact, I have memories of five great grandparents and was in graduate school when the last one of them died.
Seeing this remaining grandparent always produces mixed emotions. We are connected by blood and many shared moments, but those connections are negated by her consistently childish behavior.
She and my grandfather were married for more than 55 years until his death, and she criticized him constatnly during the time I was around. It pissed me off then, and it still bothers me that she took so much joy from his life with her comments.
He was Methodist preacher when that job not only included ministerial duties, but also groundskeeping and handyman work at the church and parsonage. He had no associate ministers, and he even printed the bulletins for the services on a manual printing press. He did all this with a quiet dignity that I still find inspiring. He was as close to a saint as I have ever known.
I know the day is quickly approaching when I will have no grandparents remaining, and I regret that my feelings about my remaining grandparent are so mixed.